To My Darling Baby Boy, On His Birthday:

One year ago today, (ok, yesterday, sheesh), I became a mother. You made me a mother by consenting to come into this life, into this home, and taking us from a couple to a family. As that is something your father and I wanted very much, and had been wishing for(individually) for at least a decade, we will always be especially grateful to you for that. I will always think of that on your birthday. Thank you for being our guinea pig; the one who teaches us how to be parents, how to cope with chaos, and how to live every day with a heart so full of love it almost hurts. You see, every time your life expands to include another person, be it friend, husband, or child, your heart expands too. What a gift from God that is, and what a gift from God you are. So, I guess, on your birthday, I also have to say thank you thank you thank you, to my wonderful, loving Heavenly Father. THANK YOU!!!

Ok, moving on to less sappy subjects...here are some things about you that I hope to always remember. A sort of verbal snapshot of my little boy at the age of 1 (don't worry, there are real snap shots below).

--You are mostly outgoing. You roam around church or family parties playing with people's shoes and pulling yourself up and patting their knees. You pull the pacifiers out of other babies mouths and investigate people's watches and jewelry and books all the while winning hearts by batting your big blue eyes and giving a wide toothy grin. Every so often you have a shy spell, which usually has more to do with how tired you are, and I suspect, is sometimes a flirtatious facade...

--You love to squeeze yourself through tiny spaces, mostly in between people's legs. If I am standing still, doing dishes or folding laundry, you will come and push your head into the back of my legs until I'm forced to spread my feet a little and you squeeze through and then you stand up in the tiny space between me and the cupboard below the sink, thereby forcing me to move back which is why my dishes are never done and my clean laundry is never folded. Sigh.

--Even though I keep hoping you will grow out of it, you still adore pulling books from shelves, and sitting and crawling on big uneven piles of books, and getting your hands on mommy's paperbacks so you can run your fingers along the edges and make the pages go fffffwwwwwwppppp.

--Often, when you are intently examining some thing (including my face) you will suddenly tilt your head to one side, not just a little, but till your head is practically parallel to your shoulder, to examine it some more from that angle. It just kills me!

--We have a game I like to refer to as "smooshface". Not as in smoosh your face with my hands; as in smoosh our two faces together in hilarious and slobbery ways.

--You love your dad. If I didn't have you to myself for 8 hours a day I might start to feel neglected! You especially love to go on tours with him. You've gotten to the point where you get a little mad if that's not the first thing he does when he comes home from work!!

--Those brightly colored toys with bells and whistles and cute animals and not-so-subtle educational stuff painted all over them designed to delight and entrance any baby are not really your thing. Oh sure, they might interest you for thirty seconds or so, but they are not nearly so wonderful as those little tins that hold lipbalm or handcream, or zipper pulls, or faucets, or light switches, or drawer handles, or mason jar lids. If it's metal or wood, you are FASCINATED.

--You do this funny thing when you will roll something, and then chase after it, but when you catch up to it you bat your hand at it so it rolls away again and you can chase after it again. The best things for this are little jars because they roll erratically. The awesome thing is you will do it with stuff that doesn't. roll. at. all. Like your toy phone. You'll just kind of bat at it until it flips over a few times and then follow after it and do it again. Then I hand you your little toy ball and you look at me like, "what's this for?" and abandon it to find something else completely unsuited for this game.

--You've finally figured out what the heck to do with stuffed animals: squeeeeeeze them, sink your teeth into them, and lay on top of them.

--Stairs are endless fun and wonderment. Someday I'm going to invent a little toy baby escalator and I will be rich!

This last weekend we went up to your Great-grandmother's and we celebrated your birthday. Here are some pics from that--you really enjoyed my homemade ginger bread!!

Here you are with daddy:

You're not so sure about that open flame...

You gingerly taste it...And voila!! the final shot: happy baby, no more gingerbread, and a demolished shirt!!



I love you little boy!! Here's hoping we have lots of lovely messy years together!